Holding Out For A Hero
by Jameson Rook
Summary: "Where's the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds? Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?" Kate confronts Kevin about the events of "Always". Kevin/Kate friendship


_**Disclaimer: Castle and all of its characters belong to Andrew W. Marlowe, Terri Edda Miller, and ABC Studio Productions. "Holding Out For A Hero" is performed by Ella Mae Bowen.**_

_** I'm not sure if anyone has written this scenario yet, or if everyone is too caught up in Caskett (trust me, I'm with you, because OUR OTP IS HAPPENING!), but I feel like this is definitely something that needs to be said about the Ryan/Kate situation. This is not meant to be a Kevin/Kate romance fic, though I have written those in the past, this is meant to touch on the fact that he saved her damned life and the gang is treating him like Patient Zero. Last thing I want to say is that, for all intents and purposes, the plot device that is Jenny Ryan does not exsist in my universe, so Kevin still lives alone.**_

**Where have all the good men gone, **

**And where are all the gods?**

**Where's the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?**

**Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?**

**Late at night I toss and turn, and dream of what I need.**

**I need a hero.**

**I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night.**

**He's gotta be strong, he's gotta be fast,**

**And he's gotta be fresh from the fight.**

**I need a hero.**

**I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of morning light.**

**He's gotta be sure, and it's gotta be soon.**

**He's gotta be larger than life.**

He sat in the stagnant silence of his apartment, a warm beer clenched in his fist, and stared at the blank television screen. He hadn't even had the intiative to reach for the remote and turn it on, but he didn't really know what else to do.

His entire team was looking at him like it was completely his fault that they'd been suspended. Sure, he'd been the one to tell Gates, but if he hadn't done it they would have gotten themselves killed. Hell, the fact that Kate had been starting a one way trip to the pavement when they'd found her was enough to have him convinced that he'd done the right thing.

Of course, she'd called him Castle when he pulled her up onto the rooftop. That was a bit strange, but he couldn't exactly say that he blamed her. Most people that had near death experiences were entitled to having a defining moment where they recognize their undying love for the person that had been in front of their face forever, and Kate had had more than her fair share of near death experiences in the past year than most people had in a lifetime.

Then there had been the incident with Espostio in the bullpen. He had done what any man in his position would have done. He saved her life and, given the chance, he'd do the same thing every time. He hadn't meant to get either of them suspended, and he sure as hell hadn't intended for Kate to resign. That had been shocking. But, when he had told Esposito that he was sorry, and his partner had just _walked away _from him like nothing in the world would ever fix their partnership? That wasn't something that he'd expected, and that wasn't something that was just going to go away.

Kevin had called Javier twenty-three times since the other man had stormed out of the bullpen, a cardboard box full of his belongings in hand, but none of them had been answered and none of his pleading voicemails seem to have done anything. He stared at the blank screen of his iPhone, praying for it to ring.

He was startled when, instead of his phone ringing, there was a timid knock at his front door. He stood on shaking legs, straightened his wrinkled t shirt and moved to the door, drawing his hand through his dishevled hair and setting his beer on the side table. His hand hovered over the doorknob a moment, not exactly wanting to open the door. He wasn't sure that he was ready to face whoever was on the other side.

"I can hear you moving around in there, Kevin Ryan, so don't even try to pretend that you're not home." Kate's voice was muffled through the wood, but it still brought a subdued laugh from him as he opened the door. He gave her a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes and gestured for her to enter. Kate brushed past him, and he saw her glance warily at the "road kill" couch before chosing to settle onto one of the bar stools near the marble counter.

He moved wordlessly to his fridge, grabbed her a beer and got another one for himself, knowing that he couldn't choke down the warm excuse for a drink that he'd had before. He slid hers in front of her, but chose not to sit, choosing instead to lean against the counter opposite her and nurse his beer slowly. Glancing at the clock, he was startled to find that it was closing in on two in the morning.

"I called you a bunch of times, but it went straight to voicemail. I figured you were either still pissed at me, or you were busy." He whispered. A blush scorched up Kate's neck and she tucked a curl of hair behind her ear shyly. He figured it was best not to question it, but a smirk spread across his face when he caught sight of the dark bite mark just under the curve of her jaw. "I'm guessing it was the latter." He chuckled, sucking down more of the drink.

"I really don't think that's something I'm going to be discussing with my partner any time soon." She replied, the blush darkening even further.

"Well, from what I understand, you handed in your tin, so I'm not your partner anymore." He waggled his eyebrows, but allowed her to skate past the subject. "But, I'm guessing that you didn't leave Castle's bed to come over and let me grill you about Writer Boy, so, why are you really here, Kate?"

"I want to talk to you."

"About?"

"About what you've done to me and Eposito."

**Somewhere after midnight, in my wildest fantasies,**

**Somewhere just beyond my reach **

**There's someone reaching back for me.**

**Racing on the thunder, and rising with the heat.**

**Isn't there a Superman to sweep me off my feet?**

**I need a hero.**

**I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night.**

**He's gotta be strong, he's gotta be fast,**

**And he's gotta be fresh from the fight.**

**I need a hero.**

**I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of morning light.**

**He's gotta be sure, and it's gotta be soon.**

**He's gotta be larger than life.**

"What do you mean 'what I've done' to you and Esposito?" He growled, setting his beer bottle down a bit too roughly, some of the liquid sloshing out over his hand. He cursed under his breath and wiped his hand over the coarse material of his jeans.

"I mean you told Gates after we explicitally asked you to keep it quiet, and you got the both of us suspended. You betrayed our trust, Kevin." She said quietly, not letting the steely exterior that she'd perfected over years waiver.

"Kate, you _know_ good and well that I had no choice." Ryan's voice cracked as he moved to stand next to her. He placed his hand on her shoulder gently and sucked in a deep breath. "You're one of my best friends, Beckett. Actually, no you're not. You're my family, Kate, and I'd be damned if I was going to let you throw away your life." His voice was dripping with the rage that he felt. How _dare_ she come into his home and be pissed at him for this?

She shocked him when she pulled him into a tight hug, her arms locked around his waist and her chin resting in the crook of his neck. It took him a moment to comprehend what was happening and hug her back. He wrapped his arms around her narrow shoulders and cradled her into his chest. He rested his chin on the top of her hair, inhaling the subtle scent of cherries.

"I don't think I understand, Kate." He whispered, the warm tracking of her tears down the side of his neck enough to shatter the remains of his heart. "What's wrong?" He pulled away and ducked to look in her eyes.

"I almost died. I almost died and, because you went against everything that I asked of you, I am alive. I'm alive and happier than I have been in a long time. You're my hero, Kevin Ryan, and I'm sorry that I've been treating you like the enemy." She whimpered. He reached forward and brushed away her tears with his thumb, smiling tenderly at her.

"Kate, I never wanted things to turn out this way, but I'm glad that I did what I did. I almost lost you once last year. I can't go through that again. You don't need to be sorry," He choked on the sob that escaped his throat as tears began down his cheeks and dropped onto her curls. "I just need you to stay. Okay? _Please, _just stay."

"I'm going to do my best, Kevin. I promise. I'm done searching for them. Rick said that if I dig any deeper, they'll kill me, and I'm not going to let that happen. I have too much going for me now." She smiled, stepping away from him and wiping her tears away. Ryan pulled his hand over his own cheeks, erasing the evidence of his tears. "You're like the big brother that I never had, and I love you, Kev. You and Javi both. And don't worry, he'll come around. I think he's just a little ashamed that you had the courage to do what he couldn't. You did what you knew was right and you saved my life. Just give him time." She zipped the oversized black sweatshirt that Kevin recognized as one that he'd seen Castle wear on many occasions.

"I love you too, Kate. And congratulations, by the way." He gestured to the coat. "You two deserve the best. Give me a ring sometime soon and we'll all get together. Talk things over. Maybe Javi will come." Kate nodded and grinned at him.

"I'd like that." She turned away and was halfway out the door before he called after her.

"You know, if you ever need a hero, all you have to do is turn around and I'll be right behind you." He whispered.

"I know, Kevin. I know." She replied and stepped out of his apartment. He stood there, grinning like an idiot, for a while. The last thing that he remembered thinking, before draining the rest of the beer from the mostly empty bottles into the sink and heading to bed, was something that Montgomery had told him on his third week on homicide service.

_"Detective Ryan, you need to remember something. Not all superheroes wear capes. In fact, most of them wear Kevlar."_

**Up where the mountains meet the heaven above,**

**Out where the lightning splits the sea,**

**I could swear that there's someone somewhere watching me.**

**Through the wind and the chill and the rain,**

**And the storm and the raging flood,**

**Oh, his approach is like a fire in my blood.**

**I'll meet a hero,**

**And then we'll dance 'til the morning light.**

**Dreaming, he will lead me,**

**Held tight, tonight's the night.**

**I need a hero,**

**I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night.**

**He's gotta be strong, he's gotta be fast,**

**And he's gotta be fresh from the fight.**

**I need a hero,**

**I'm holding out 'til the morning light.**

**He's gotta be sure, he's gotta be soon,**

**And he's gotta be larger than life, larger than life.**

**Oh, larger than life, larger than life.**

**Maybe, maybe tonight.**

_** Thoughts? Reactions? Suggestions? Drop me a review and let me know.**_

_** Much love, J. Rook**_


End file.
